The (mis)adventures of my spectacles

Last week I had to spend almost 4000 bucks to get myself 2 new pairs of spectacles because I had just broken the 8th pair in my life. And this is the first time I got 2 at a time as I seem to have become prone to losing/breaking my spectacles with an alarming regularity of late. So I just want to have a backup pair ready in case another such mishap takes place in the future.

I know most of my friends, family, colleagues and fellow bloggers wear either spectacles or contact lenses. When I look at a group photo of mine, its usually the bespectacled who outnumber the not-so-spectacled ones. I wear specs. Both my parents use reading glasses. Listed fellow bloggers are all certified specs/lens wearers. So are most of the Shanky_PP and SPDSPD (a group of 6,details of which you can find on my Orkut communities page) members. I think its fair enough to say that we would in fact be incomplete without these extensions of our body form. Well, almost.

I've been wearing specs since I was 15 and this piece of blog is dedicated to the numerous specs I've worn over the years, and broken!

Eyeglasses used to be equated with learned and profound men. Over the years, eyeglasses have become more like fashion accessories and don't remain just a medium of visual correction. I, of course, can claim to be neither profound, nor fashionable. I wear eyeglasses for the simple reason that without them I cannot read a book from 3 feet. Yesterday, I had to spend the entire day without my specs as I made the painful mistake of leaving them at home when leaving for office. I cannot insist enough the alleviation I felt when I reached back home and put them atop my nose. Ah, the clarity of vision provided by this noble invention of a noble man is such a blessing for us, the "visually challenged". You know the first thing I treated myself with with my first paycheck? It was a pair of power-sunglasses! I had begged daddy dear to get me a pair of power-sunglasses a number of times earlier. But again, to him its just a piece of fashion accessory and not something that can protect your eyes in the strong sun and wind. And these very power-sunglasses saved me from a certain tragedy yesterday. I could drive back home only because of them. Although I did have to leave office a little early so that I could get back home before dark or I would have looked like a complete jerk wearing sunglasses in the late evening (almost night!).

I'd like to ask people about different ways they've managed to break/crack/pulverize/lose their eyeglasses. I'll list here a few of my own. So, here goes...

1. The easiest one probably - sit on them as lay quietly on the bed/chair/table etc.
2. Hide them safely and forget where you  hid them.
3. Vent your anger on them.
4. Make them fall from an unsafe height.
5. Ride your bike with them hanging by the collar/neck/V of your T-shirt, reach home and find them missing from the collar/neck/V of your T-shirt (this is how I lost my last one!).

Hope this would bring back some life to my blog after an extended hibernation!

I even found this bit of poetry while googling around...

An Ode to Spectacles - by William Cow

Between Nose and Eyes a strange contest arose-
The spectacles set them unhappily wrong;
The point in dispute was, as all the world knows,
To which the said spectacles ought to belong.

So Tongue was the lawyer, and argued the cause
With a great deal of skill, and a wig full of learning;
While chief baron Ear sat to balance the laws,
So famed for his talent in nicely discerning.

In behalf of the Nose, it will quickly appear,
And your lordship, he said, will undoubtedly find
That the Nose has had spectacles always in wear,
Which amounts to possession time out of mind.

Then holding the spectacles up to the court-
Your lordship observes they are made with a straddle
As wide as the ridge of the Nose is; in short,
Designed to sit close to it, just like a saddle.

Again, would your lordship a moment suppose?
(‘Tis a case that has happened, and may be again)
That the visage or countenance had not a nose;
Pray who would, or could, wear spectacles then?

On the whole it appears- and my argument shows,
With reasoning the court will never condemn,
That the spectacles plainly were made for the Nose,
And the nose was as plainly intended for them.

Then, shifting his side (as a lawyer knows how),
He pleaded again on behalf of the Eyes;
But what were his arguments few people know,
For the court did not think they were equally wise.

So his lordship decreed with a grave solemn tone,
Decisive and clear, without one if or but-
That whenever the Nose put his spectacles on,
By daylight or candlelight- Eyes should be shut.